Is your grief spilling over too?

My mom and me after she finished decorating our Christmas tree after I had surgery 11/30/2010

I have not written anything on my blog for over two years. Been on a bit of a sabbatical of sorts but feel the pull to, as my friend Jennifer Hand says, to put my YES on the table with writing again.

I posted a shorter form of this to FB this morning and, in seeing the comments, I realized perhaps others are feeling the same way I am feeling or know someone who is.

I hope it blesses you.

My grief is spilling over today

I miss my moms voice, her grace, her prayers and her love and acceptance of me no matter how badly I messed up. She was my greatest prayer warrior, often my first birthday or Christmas card.

When I had surgery to remove 1/4 of my colon(to make sure the CA had not spread) on 11/30/2010 she came and took care of me, put up my Christmas decorations and loved on me. Yup at 54 I still needed my mom and at 65 I am still needing her and grieving her loss this year. She went home to be with Jesus Feb 4/5 of this year….depending on which time zone each of my siblings lived in.


I say all this not for sympathy, Jesus brings me great comfort and peace, but to remind everyone that this has been a year of great loss for many. If the grieving don’t want to attend parties or do the normal Christmas season things don’t assume they want to be alone. They are already feeling alone missing their loved ones. One on one might be a better option. Invite them to go for coffee, thrift store hopping, let your little ones love on them (my bonus grands are my best medicine) or just ask them if they would like a friend to come and listen and then listen to them, even if the listening includes silence.


Grief has many stages and the grieving many needs. Don’t assume someone will just get over it or is over it because grief is a long journey and it rears it’s ugly head at the most unexpected times.


My heartfelt prayer is for those grieving, myself included, that they will feel free to say no when they need to back away and to allow the tears to fall without shame or an admonition to just “get over it”. The grieving also need to embrace the things that bring joy in the hard times without unneeded guilt for enjoying themselves even in their time of grief.


“Weeping may tarry for the night,, but joy comes in the morning”. Psalm 30:5
Sometimes those nights seem like they go on forever but joy will come, eventually.


“This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.” Psalm 118:24.
My friend, Sylvia Fletcher, always says “This is the day the Lord has made and I CHOOSE to rejoice in it.” Happiness and feelings are fleeting and deceptive but when you choose to rejoice, no matter the circumstances, you are choosing to focus on the positive, even through tears knowing that God is our good, good God, He loves you and has you in the palm of his hand.


Today I choose to rejoice, even as the tears trickle down my face, and I WILL do some Christmas decorating knowing how much my mama loved Christmas and the hope that the birth of Jesus brought and still brings to those that believe.


Sending love and hugs to all those who are grieving this Christmas season.

Me, my bonus daughter, Randi, and 5 of my 6 bonus grandsons on a Fall Festival hay ride at their church ❤️

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